And we’re back. Today in ways to recycle old clothes, namely the bodycon mini skirt you accidentally purchased in 2008 during an unusual lapse of good judgement: meaningfully layering loads of better judgement over the bodycon mini skirt you accidentally purchased in 2008 during an uncomfortable lapse of good judgement. It’s a quick six step process that requires fewer layers more evenly distributed than typically…distributed. Today it seems, I can’t compose one single proper English sentence. I’d suggest you simply skim the below content, it’s for your own good.

I know what you’re thinking, I’m right there with you and yes, it’s true: BCBG. I figure if there’s any way to successfully host a round of Getter to Repeller, it’s proper to start where things are tight, simple, leggy. On an unrelated note too, now that I think of it, the shoes, found in the trenches of a sample sale room last season, are probably an interesting homage to yesterday’s look at Balenciaga pre-fall 1981 2012.

In an easy effort to start the layering process, here’s one thick sweater that stays in true spirit of what conventional New York dressing is about: forgetting that real color exists. You can’t see it now but there are some fly suede patches residing on my elbows like cool little elbow dwellers that enjoy a good flex every now and then.

I’m not sure if I meant to wink, but I’m happy this photo turned out as it did. Step three starts the distribution-of-layering process. Black tights have this magical way about them where even the tightest of skirts lose their leggy factor with just a small kiss of the inevitable opaque hovering.

In this step, I reverse the initial skirt so that the upside-down V coyly pointing to the nether regions are now behind me, alluding to Uranus, and include another skirt-as-peplum. It’s an easy and relevant winter fix that gives new dimension to clothes you may have dubbed unwearable. I’ll take this a step further and say man repelling kind of preaches that with the right layering tactics and facial expressions, nothing is ever unwearable.

And now, the accessory change. Generally speaking, headgear is ambiguous, most often pretentious and so always perfect. Pumps on the other hand, fine sometimes but you never know when life may take you on a spontanteous trip to the moon. Be prepared with the right footwear.

Detail shot, bla bla bla. So many bracelets, so little arm space. Hardware and knit threads can’t seem to get along and thus perfecting the art of partying with your limbs has proven uncomfortable in a colder climate. Should you find yourself in this predicament, steer clear of crystals, revive your old friendship bracelets. And to put speculations to rest about the frizzy freak growing everywhere, behold the final step:

Looks a lot more like Balenciaga Pre Fall 1981. Fashion is great because it can be whatever you want it to be. For Nicolas Ghesquiere, this collection was as Hamish Bowles noted, a salute to the eclecticism of postmodernism. So many prints, so many layers, so much color, eureka. Every bit unappealing to the male-eye. I don’t think I’ve seen an homage this dedicated to reliving the past since the actual past. And I wasn’t even there, which does theoretically rid me an authoritative license but then again, doesn’t photographic proof that hails from the trenches of my mother’s twenties count for anything?

And finally, another season of undermining the importance of vision with headgear that doubles as face-gear. I can get behind the notion of shielding ones eyes, great for infants or manfriends struck with the plague of man-repellers-for-lady-friends, but what happens when you just…want to see? Oh, you take it off? Interesting. Overall, I commend the overwhelming theme commitment and attention to detail, most notably, a certain pair of lampshade gloves. But what do you think? Do share.